BREATHING SPACE FOR RUNAWAYS

Stopover helps kids learn to make better choices.

RUNNING AWAY

When Jon didn't agree with the rules at home and wouldn't follow them anyway, he decided to run away.

For a while, he stayed with a friend whose parents were out of town, but eventually he ended up at Stopover, a voluntary, not-for-profit agency near Downtown Indianapolis dedicated to rehabilitating kids who have run away. The shelter can house only eight kids at a time.

The location of the shelter is kept secret to protect the children who participate in the program.

Jon, 16, was lucky to end up at Stopover because running away is considered a status offense _ an act that's against the law when committed by minors. In Marion County a child is charged with running away if he does it over and over.

When the police find runaways, they are handcuffed and treated like criminals to make an impression, according to Elizabeth Malone, director of Stopover.

According to Sgt. Daniel Grau of the Indianapolis Police Department's juvenile division, it's a departmental procedure to handcuff anyone who rides in the back of a police car.

"You think about why the person ran away and what sort of problems he or she had," Grau said. "You wonder about that. . . . Chronic runaways typically have problems at home."

The Police Department has a couple of approaches for runaways: They either take them home or they take them to the Marion County Children's Guardian Home if they know there's a family-related problem.

The Children's Defense Fund estimates that 3,288 kids run away each day in the United States. According to Malone, the number of runaways ages 10 to 18 is about 2,500 a year in Indianapolis.

Some of them end up at Stopover.

"Kids can stay here for 14 days," Malone said, "and while they are here we provide them with a place to sleep and food. We also provide them with some recreation and transportation if they are going to school or work.

"It's a program that really runs on cooperation. . . . Everyone has a daily chore and everyone takes care of their own area."

At Stopover, the rules are strict. The participants have to ask to go to their rooms, there's a limit on the telephone and television, and they are not able to go out with their friends.

The Stopover program doesn't just stop with the child who has run away. "We provide counseling for parents and other family members if the parents want other kids (to get involved)," Malone said.

"What we urge families to do is recognize that usually the problems that have caused the runaway have been going on for a long time and they really need to get into some long-term counseling in order to really resolve the problem."

According to Malone, many factors cause kids to run away. "Sometimes kids run away about problems that they think are going to be a real crisis in their family . . . maybe something at school, when really it's not as big a deal as they think it's going to be."

Malone said that when kids first arrive they are usually nervous, so the staff must begin building trust by letting them adjust at their own pace. After the trust is built, there are discussions and time to decide what will be the next step for each individual.

"You get a lot of time by yourself to think things over and decide on what you're going to do to make things better at home _ or if you even want to be at home," said Jon.