INTERNET SITE GIVES TEEN-AGERS FORUM FOR ADVICE

Imagine you arrive home from school, exhausted. You plop down in front of the computer, and an e-mail pops up from someone you've never met, pouring her heart out about her suicidal thoughts.

For most teens, this would be terrifying, but the young volunteers at Teen Advice Online receive e-mails like this almost every day.

Teen Advice Online, or TAO, is a Web-based organization that uses a team of teens and young adults to provide support not only to young people, but also to parents and educators from at least 83 countries. Y-Press spoke with two counselors, Julie Shedron, 21, and Rebecca Blackmore, 20, and the director of the site, C.J. Fenner.

The counselors, who must be at least 13, volunteer to receive the e-mail requests from teens or even teachers or parents. They respond in about a week, Shedron said.

The Web site is the brainchild of Fenner's son, Trev. He came up with the concept in 1996, when he was 15.

"He wrote a letter to his then-girlfriend and said, 'I just thought of an awesome idea about having a Web site, you know, with questions and answers kind of like Dear Abby,' " C.J. Fenner said.

It began as a simple chat channel but has grown into a network that has given advice to more than 38,000 people all over the world.

Fenner took over for her son later in 1996 because he could not go to school while still devoting six to eight hours each day to the group.

"It's pretty much my life," she said.

Teen Advice Online, which can be accessed at www.teenadvice online.org, is a well-organized Web site. Links lead to descriptions of counselors, articles of importance to teens, a form for asking questions and a chat channel.

Fenner reviews the questions, then forwards them to her counselors. The organization can handle up to 300 questions a week.

Fenner said more than twice as many girls than boys use the service. Most of the users are 13 to 15.

"The most common questions are about relationships, whether they're about their friends or about dating-type relationships, or about parents," she said.

Queries also involve concerns about appearances and acts of self-mutilation. One incident even led to FBI involvement.

Fenner receives thousands of counselor applications, but only a few are selected.

"I'm looking for someone with experiences in life, someone who has experienced and learned," she said. "The number one skill you have to have is writing well, being able to type well, because that's what it's all about -- being able to convey caring words to someone."

Julie Shedron was cruising the Internet when she found the group and decided to apply. Blackmore was looking for advice and found the group with a search engine.

"I asked a question, and I got several replies, which was really special. I was reading over the site and I found that it was very interesting and I felt like I'd like to do something like that," she said.

Blackmore has been a counselor for 18 months, Shedron for two years. Neither received training; both said they use personal experience when answering questions.

"I've gotten thank-yous from people all the way around the world," Shedron said.

Blackmore added: "You feel like you've really been able to give a part of yourself to another person."

But it is a lot of work.

"I am working anywhere from eight to 12 hours a day," said Fenner, and she isn't the only one who must commit a lot of time. Counselors must respond to at least 10 questions a week.

"You really have to be focused, and it's not joking around. You really have to take your own opinion and be honest and answer their question, and make sure you have enough time to do it," Blackmore said.

"You have to be willing to spend that time helping people," Shedron said. "You really have to have a dedication to wanting to help people that depend on you for help."

Volunteering at Teen Advice Online can be beneficial for students such as Shedron and Blackmore.

"I'm studying psychology, and I'm getting an idea of what kind of problems face teen-agers today," Shedron said. "I'm getting experience in what I want to do."

But the work is not always easy.

"I think the most difficult (questions) I get are usually dealing with girls or men who have been sexually abused either by a family member or friend or somebody they know," Shedron said. "You personally know when you're answering it that they need to get help, but it's easier said than done because they're scared, . . . and when I send an e-mail back to them, I'm just hoping, praying that they find the courage within themselves to get help. I really stress to them that, 'It's OK; it's not your fault. You just got to take one day at a time, and you'll move forward in your life.' "

Blackmore's most difficult question came from a girl who was cutting and burning herself.

"I dated someone who did that for a time," she said. "It's really hard to answer those kinds of questions because you can't just convince someone to stop harming themselves just in a letter. It really has to be more someone talking to them in person and letting them know that they really do care."

In addition to the confidential one-on-one guidance from counselors, Teen Advice Online offers an immense archive of past advice.

"The convenience of TAO is when you're at home alone and you have a question now, you have a worry now, you're sad now and your friend isn't around, your family isn't around, TAO is there 24 hours a day," Fenner said.

"It's just such a good thing for people, especially teen-agers obviously, that need advice and they don't feel like they have anybody to count on or they don't know who to go to," Shedron said.

Fenner summarized what makes volunteering such a worthwhile experience: "The reward is life. The reward is the smiles. The reward is people seeing the future. The reward is people feeling good about being in control of their lives and their destiny, and seeing that they do have to make decisions, that it really is up to them."

REPORTERS: David Baumann, 12; Emily Campbell, 12; Allison Gardner, 11; Kellie Moore, 12.