NAME — Erica Bellamy
AGE — 27
NAME — Kia Woodson
AGE — 2008
GRADE —
When your parent is sick, you have to take on more responsibilities. Sometimes you get mad because they throw everything on you at once, but then you realize that you really love them and nothing is more important than they are.
Over the years, cancer will occur in three out of every four families, according to the National Institutes of Health. In recent phone interviews, Children's Express talked to three children who are part of this statistic. All of them are from Indianapolis, and all agree that their parents' cancer has changed their lives.
The diagnosis
KIMBERLY CAUDLE, 19: It's been almost two years (since her mom was diagnosed). I became more conscious about her health than ever. I became a worrisome daughter. I stayed on her case about everything as far as her health was concerned.
MICHELLE WHITAKER, 8: (Dad was diagnosed) two months or so ago. (My parents) said that he was going to the hospital because his back was hurting. . . . It was sad.
I was scared that maybe he'd be there for a year or so.
TAMMY FLEWELLING, 11: (Dad) had (cancer) for two years, then he got rid of it for a year, then he had it back. One night my mom came home from the hospital and she sat us down and she was talking to us. And so then that's when we found out. . . .
I cried and I cried and I cried. I was shocked. . . . They were healthy and stuff.
Talking to someone
KIMBERLY: The majority of my friends know about it. My friends were very supportive throughout the whole process of it. . . . They were there for me if I needed somebody to talk to. . . . They acted more mature than what I expected them to.
MICHELLE: I didn't tell (my friends my dad had cancer). My neighbor knows. They are friendly and they care.
TAMMY: I didn't want to communicate with any of my friends. (Then I told) some of them, just to help a little to get it out. Some of them were shocked.
KIMBERLY: I don't really think support groups help. I didn't go through a support group or anything. I think the best thing for children that have parents who have cancer, I think the best type of support they can get is love and support from their own family members because they understand more. . . . I think that's more beneficial than having people outside of your family trying to tell you about it.
TAMMY: (Support groups) make you feel better because the support people can go over it further than like what your parents can. . . . like talk to you more about it.
How life has changed
TAMMY: He has headaches all the time and he lays down and we have to do stuff with my mom. If he didn't have cancer, then he could do more things and stuff. He could be able to play basketball or he could be able to run and other stuff.
That's what I would change about him, because he would be more fun.
MICHELLE: It really hurts that it happened to be yourself.
KIMBERLY: It's made me more health- conscious. . . . I started taking better care of myself. I had started smoking when I was 18 and, you know, after I thought about it for a while and thought about what she went through, I mean it caused me to immediately stop. All of a sudden you become this really health-conscious person. I would tell people not to take it to extremes too much, 'cause that can be kind of deadly. Advice to kids
KIMBERLY: Don't be ashamed of what's going on. It's a natural thing. I don't think it's something you should keep to yourself.
MICHELLE: If their dad or mom had cancer, even though you're sad, try not to get real upset. Looking back
KIMBERLY: If I could have just kept on forcing her to go to the doctor when she was complaining about her breasts, like years before she was even diagnosed with cancer, I would. I would mention it to her and she wouldn't pay any attention to me.
MICHELLE: I liked the way it was before.
TAMMY: It's made me realize reality I guess. It makes me sad all the time when somebody talks about it. . . .
I wish he would live.
Reported and edited by Erica Bellamy, 11, and Kia Woodson, 13.