Volunteer parents enjoy togetherness

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NAME — Adrienne McLean
AGE — 19

VOLUNTEER PARENTS ENJOY TOGETHERNESS

November 7, 2004

For most kids today, time spent with parents is limited. Many parents work, and kids are busy with activities such as band, sports or scouts after school. But some families have found a way to spend more time together.

Some parents volunteer in their children's extracurricular activities. Izaak Hayes, 14, and twins John and Jeffrey Klyce, 19, participate in 4-H along with their parents. Jennifer Harter, 15, is a Girl Scout and has her mother as a leader. Austin Schweiger, 15, plays basketball for his mom and used to play soccer for his dad. Likewise, Emma Shipley, 13, has her dad as her soccer coach.

Some of the teens said their parents' involvement has kept them interested in their shared activities.

"I would have never gotten involved in 4-H. They were the ones that really got me started," said John, son of Penny Marsh.

Jennifer said she was ready to drop out of Girl Scouts when her mother urged her to join her new troop. "I'm glad that I did because otherwise I wouldn't still be here in Girl Scouts," she said.

For others, their interest in an activity prompted their parents' involvement. That was true of both kids involved in sports.

"My favorite part is probably getting to spend more time with my parents, unlike some other kids who say they don't have enough time with their parents," said Austin.

None of the kids said their parents favor them.

Said Emma: "My dad normally tries to make it as equal as he can. And if he can, he almost doesn't give me as much attention as he does the other kids. If I do need help, he will give me help later on, but at practice he tries mostly to help the other kids."

Some do get extra help -- later. "It's just a relief to know that she's there when I need her," Jennifer said.

Izaak said his parents are there when he needs them most. "They have saved my heinie a lot of times in my 4-H projects, especially when it is just like last minute. I need a lot of help."

However, other kids can resent those whose parents are involved.

"They're just jealous that their parents don't help them with whatever they need help with," Austin said.

Another down side is that kids must attend all meetings and practices, unless they have a good excuse. "That is the worst when you're going to a meeting you don't really want to go to. And they're pressuring you to sign up for all sorts of stuff you don't really want to do," said Izaak.

In addition, the expectations are greater sometimes.

"I have a lot of pressure by being the coach's daughter. I have to be nice to everyone, and I have to include everyone even if I don't want to because that's just something that my dad expects me to do," said Emma.

And sometimes parents are a little too enthusiastic. Austin says his mom can get very excited during practice and games.

"My mom is a yeller. It's mostly guidance. She can be embarrassing sometimes," he said.

But generally, kids and parents save the criticism for home.

"I have had arguments, but I try to save them just for afterwards because it's kind of awkward for the other team members," said Emma.

For these teens, parental involvement is a plus. "I do think having somebody help you and having somebody kind of look out for you is probably one of the best parts of having a parent involved in your activities, especially when you are in big groups of kids," said Izaak.

"It's made me play better, knowing that they are there to support me," said Emma. "It has given us a chance to be together each week, so it brings us closer."

ASSISTANT EDITORS: Collin LaMothe, 14; Zoe Hayes, 16; Rebecca Salois, 15.

REPORTERS: Meagan Gardner, 11; Emily Kasnak, 13.

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